Now the overseer must be above reproach, the husband of but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. (1 Timothy 3:2-3)
When we think of a “good Christian leader,” we probably all have different pictures. Sometimes we focus on charisma or success or evangelistic fervor or church growth or preaching ability or how many books they write. But God’s focus is different. God’s focus is on character not ability. The person with character makes an impact in God’s kingdom–whether that person is a leader in the church or not. So what does godly character look like?
It is above reproach. We are to live a life of integrity. We are to live above board, with nothing to hide. Who we are at church should be the same as who we are during the week. Integrity (which literallly means “wholeness, without duplicity”) is at the heart of true godly character.
It is family-centered. Right after dealing with integrity, Paul immediately mentions the husband-wife relationship (the parent-child relationship gets mentioned in verse 4). Integrity is first displayed in one’s marriage (if one is married) and family relationships. “Husband of one wife” could be translated “one-woman man” which emphasizes the fact that a man of integrity is not just married to one woman but has a growing, faithful, committed relationship to the one he is married to.
It is self-controlled. So many of the characteristics mentioned in 1 Timothy 3 focus on some aspect of self-control–temperate, respectable, not given to drunkenness, not violent, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. Proverbs 25:28 says, Whoever has no rule over his own spirit Is like a city broken down, without walls. A person without self-control is like a loose cannon. Sooner or later someone is going to get hurt. Each day we live in the Spirit we are to grow in our ability to control our passions and channel our energies toward God’s purposes.
It is friendly toward others. It is amazing to me that “hospitable” makes the list as one of the most important characteristics of a godly individual. And it is not just on this list. Paul mentions it again in Titus 1 and Peter includes it on his list of characteristics for “end time living” (1 Peter 4). Opening up our homes is a way of opening up our lives to others. It is a necessary part of fellowship and a vital aspect of growth. Again I think of the Proverbs, Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment (18:1). Isolation and cocooning is one of the most unhealthy things we can do in the body of Christ.
It is able to teach. The one ability that makes the list is the ability to teach. And though Paul is specifically speaking of church leaders in 1 Timothy 3, I think that teaching is the one ability that all of us should work on improving. We should all seek ways to improve our effectiveness in communicating truth to others…whether as pastors, parents, siblings, Sunday School teachers, AWANA leaders, neighbors, co-workers or friends.
So the person of impact in God’s kingdom is a person of integrity, family-centered, self-controlled, friendly toward others and able to communicate. Certainly more could be added to the list but this is a good start with more than enough for each of us to work at.
Lord, I dedicate my life to You. May my actions, emotions, thoughts, attitudes, and words bring You glory and encourage someone else today.