Immediately the rooster crowed the second time. Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken to him: “Before the rooster crows twice you will disown me three times.” And he broke down and wept. (Mark 14:72)
There is so much to consider in Mark 14. Initially my eyes were drawn to the woman who anointed Jesus’ feet and the disdain expressed toward her by the disciples. “What a waste of money! We could have sold that perfume and given the money to the poor,” they said. Sounds noble, loving and just. But Jesus saw it differently. “This woman did a beautiful thing. It was an act of worship. If you want to help the poor, you will have plenty of opportunities but this was her opportunity to show devotion to Me.” It was a reminder of how critical we can become of others under the guise of good motives. Judas was so offended by Jesus’ rebuke (and the loss of money) that he decided to betray Jesus. The man with the “generous heart” for the poor went out and betrayed Jesus for thirty pieces of silver. Things are not always as they appear. That’s why it is good to stay humble and avoid a critical spirit.
But the passage that caught my attention this morning was Peter’s denial of the Lord. I cannot escape the picture or the emotion of that scene. Peter, the strong one, the one who will never deny the Lord, the confident one, denies Him three times in quick succession. And as soon as the third denial leaves his lips, the rooster begins to crow. In an instant, Peter remembers Jesus’ words–”Before the rooster crows twice you will disown Me three times”–and crumbles to the ground. The words are graphic: “And he broke down and wept.” The strong one was broken. The confident one was reduced to tears.
There are times that our pride gets out of control. We don’t really see it but others usually do and God certainly does. We become obstinate, self-righteous, critical of others, confident in ourselves and in our strengths. Often such pride masks itself in spirituality. “I will never deny the Lord.” “I wouldn’t do that.” “My faith is strong.” But such pride is a cancer that eats away at our spirit and makes us cold toward God and toward others. God must break such pride, for our own sakes. The breaking is never pleasant and never easy. The disease is ugly and so the medicine must be strong. God brings us to the point where we see our sin, see our weakness, see our utter bankruptcy before Him. It is only here that God can begin to build us into the image of His Son. The decrepit building of pride must be demolished, the rubble removed, and the foundation cleared so that a new building, a new person, can arise in its place.
Peter broke down and wept. Every conception he had of himself as a self-made man, a tough fisherman, and a committed disciple was removed. Now God could make him into the man he needed to be. A weak man infused with the power of Christ.
As Paul, another broken man, discovered, “Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12:9b-10).
When you really read and consider Paul’s words, you almost want to check his temperature. Boast in my weaknesses? Delight in weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, difficulties? Sounds crazy. And it really is. But Paul knew that his pride was so strong, so rooted in his heart, that unless the medicine was strong, the pride would never die. Though the medicine was bitter, Paul saw the results as sweet. “When I am weak, then I am strong”…because then, and only then, I am resting fully on the power of Jesus Christ.
Lord, I am not there yet. Such brokenness is frightening. But teach me to trust You when the times of breaking come. And let me experience Your presence, power, and grace so that I do not lose hope.