“When I lie down, I say, ‘When shall I arise, And the night be ended?’ For I have had my fill of tossing till dawn. My flesh is caked with worms and dust, My skin is cracked and breaks out afresh. My days are swifter than a weaver’s shuttle, And are spent without hope. Oh, remember that my life is a breath! My eye will never again see good.” (Job 7:4-7)
You get a picture of Job’s grief, despair, and chronic pain in chapter 7. The nights seem to never end and the days fly by “swifter than a weaver’s shuttle.” His skin is cracked and caked with worms and dust. This may not be an exaggeration. Some have diagnosed Job’s condition as elephantiasis–a disease actually caused by a parasitic worm. One website described the condition of elephantiasis as follows:
“Elephantiasis is characterized by the gross enlargement of a limb or areas of the trunk or head. There is an abnormal accumulation of watery fluid in the tissues (edema) causing severe swelling. The skin usually develops a thickened, pebbly appearance and may become ulcerated and darkened. Fever, chills and a general feeling of ill health (malaise) may be present.” (http://elephantiasis.freeyellow.com/)
Whatever condition Job had, he is obviously in daily physical pain on top of his extreme emotional grief and spiritual anguish. Physically Job is in pain and drained of energy. Emotionally he is in despair and without hope. Spiritually he feels that God is his enemy pointing arrows at him not his friend holding him in His arms. In such a condition, Job says, “Therefore I will not keep silent; I will speak out in the anguish of my spirit, I will complain in the bitterness of my soul” (7:11). This is the language of lament and it is found often in Scripture. Numerous psalms cry out to God in similiar anguish and the whole book of Lamentations is dedicated to Jeremiah’s lament over the destruction of Jerusalem.
We have lost the language of lament in our own age and culture. Perhaps we are too comfortable or too apathetic or too safe in our spiritual walk. We haven’t forgotten how to complain. We just usually complain about the wrong things and to the wrong people. Job lifts his lament to God. He pours out his soul to Him. His friends try to correct him but God apparently prefers honest complaint to Him rather than pious facades before others.
Maybe we are just too emotionally stunted in our culture. We don’t know what to do with intense emotions so we bottle them up until we either explode in anger over some unrelated incident or physically suffer with some stress-related illness.
I certainly don’t have it figured out but there seems to be a vital connection in the Bible between emotional maturity and spiritual maturity. It is not that a person is to be controlled by their emotions but they are to feel them, experience them, and learn to express them, particularly to God. When we stifle our emotions or deny them, we harden a part of our heart.
Lord, teach me to be more aware of my emotions and better able to express them to You.